Reagan Tate has been such a peaceful little baby! It honestly has been a blessing and Scott and I are kind of waiting for the storm to hit. We are hopeful that she keeps this peaceful personality because Heaven knows we need a peacemaker in our family!
Week 1: April 3-9
Melia and Ellie have been smitten with Reagan since the moment they first saw her. having her home with us and watching these two girlies love on their baby has been so heartwarming. We are still working with Ellie on how to be gentle; she is such an enthusiastic person in nature that gentleness is difficult for her. Ellie definitely has her gentle moments, and those moments are the ones that I love to watch. Melia is constantly asking to hold Reagan and we really love that. It is still a little hard because Reagan's neck isn't strong enough yet, but we will help Melia hold her and Melia just beams with joy and love.
Reagan had a check up with Dr. Todd at 2 days old. Something that not everyone knows is that Reagan was born with several heart murmurs and two small holes. Because they lasted for more than 24 hours after birth, the pediatrician on site advised we see our regular pediatrician as soon as possible. By 2 days old, Reagan's murmurs had closed and Todd couldn't hear anything. So we are thanking our lucky stars that everything turned out alright!
By the end of this week, I had crashed hard. I think I tried to do to much, too soon and it caught up to me.
Week 2: April 10-17
My crash at the end of last week really made me take it back and slow down. I let the laundry go (which I'm still playing catch up with at this moment!), I let the showers and getting ready for the day slide unless I was going somewhere, and I tried to sit and relax more. Scott has been, as always, a major blessing in all of this new and challenging change. He actually surprised me by telling me he was getting us a cat. My postpartum depression and anxiety was so bad with Ellie and he wanted to get a cat, which is my comfort animal, to help me with that. He is a three year old Russian Blue and he is very affectionate and friendly and we named him Smokey.
This week, Reagan also got to meet her Great Grandpa Tarbox and it was a special moment. Grandma and Grandpa Tarbox have 17 great grandchildren now, but a lot of them are spread across the country and the last one that was born here in Utah was Charlie! It's been awhile since there has been a fresh baby in the family, so it has been fun watching G&G T swoon over Reagan.
Reagan has, so far, been a really great sleeper. Even for being this little. We get 4 hours stretches from her at night of slid sleep. She's still trying to figure out the night and day thing, but I will take 4 hours of sleep where I can take it.
Week 3: April 18-24
This week was really busy and crazy. I had already committed to different doctor's appoints and events and I was determined to keep them all. I did make it all and I am glad I did. Easter Sunday was this week and the girls got to go on two Easter Egg Hunts! My Aunt Jodi was in town and she hung out at my mom's a few days and we got to set up a hunt with my girls and Juniper, their second cousin. They had so much fun! It was a beautiful day and the girls got to run around the yard all afternoon playing. My mom, Jodi, Mandi and myself all chatted and laughed as June gathered almost half the stash before Melia and Ellie even made it to 10 eggs. Melia, in her true nature, kept gibing Ellie some of her own eggs to try and help Ellie feel good about her collection. It was a really fun afternoon.
A very good friend of mine, Alton, had his Utah Wedding Reception this week and I am so glad I went. I met Alton and I met our Freshman year at BYU and he was a rock solid friend during some really crappy moments in my life. I hadn't seen Alton since our Freshman year, which is INSANE to me, but I was so glad to get out and see him for such a happy event!
Melia had an ENT appointment this week to check the tubes in her ears. She has now had them for a year and a half and they finally look like they're starting to move out. That poor girl has sad little ears. She has actually had an ear infection recently, which we thought was really hard to get with tubes in, but she managed. I fear we are in for trouble with her ears. BUT! As we were pulling into the parking lot at the hospital where her doctor is, there was a firetruck that had pulled in and parked as well. The girls were THRILLED! They, after asking if it was okay, ran over to the Firemen and their truck to say hello. Ellie gave them high fives and Melia instantly asked for stickers. The firemen offered to let them climb into their truck, but the girls got super nervous about it. We all walked in together as Ellie continued to talk their ears off about how old she is and everything about herself. It was really cute.
By the end of this week, Reagan has really started to figure out day and night. Our 4 hours of nighttime sleep has slowly been increasing and we are at a steady 5, sometimes 6 hours of sleep from her at night. That's almost a full night's sleep! Woohoo!! We have learned that Reagan does not like to snuggle on her stomach. She likes to be out. After she eats, we usually burp her quickly and try to turn her around because she gets fussy. She likes to lay on her back and see the world around her. Honestly though, this is about the extent of her fussing at us. She really has been a happy baby and cries only when she's in need of a diaper change or hungry. She whimpers really when she is tired. It is a very different kind of fussing.
Week 4: April 25- May 1
This week was less busy, nothing scheduled on the calendar, so it was nice to be home really this week. Unfortunately, Reagan was much fussier than normal this week plus, I was totally losing my mind trying to figure out how to use our ring sling to carry her around the house. I was trying to catch up with the house and laundry (still behind on it) and because Reagan was super clingy this week, I was not getting anything done! I was tired, she was tired, Melia and Ellie were tired. It was just a hard week. I'm starting to feel like I need to be busy again and the weather still hasn't been quite good enough to play outside so we are all feeling cooped up at this point in the postpartum journey.
This week was Scott and my 7th wedding anniversary! We celebrated by having Megan, one of my sweet swimmers, babysit for us and Scott and I went to get sushi just around the corner. Megan watched all three of our girlies! It was nice to have just a minute with Scott and have some dinner, specifically SUSHI, by ourselves. Our lives have quickly developed to a crazy, fast-paced world surrounded by chaos and laughter of our sweet girlies. I wouldn't have it any other way. Scott is my rock, my confidant and such a wonderful father to our girls. I am truly blessed to have him and call him mine forever!
Another happy part of this week is that Reagan has started to make little happy baby babbles! It is so fun to listen to her sign and coo and chirp and make all the cute noises. Melia and Ellie has started to try and coax her into chatting so we have all types of little noises going on in the house trying to encourage Reagan to make sounds. Reagan also really loves to have her hands held. When she is getting fussy, holding her hand really calms her down. It makes me really happy because it means that when she is tired and snuggly, she also wants to hold onto a finger and it's just super cute.
Week 5: May 2- 8
Another crazy week for us! Ellie turned 3 this week!! It is hard to believe that she is already 3, but she has filled our lives with laughter, loves, genuine smiles, frustration, tears, and her fireball personality for 3 whole years. We had a funfetti Baymax birthday cake and small family party for her with her dinner request of, and yes this is her request, grilled chicken, rice and broccoli! This girl cracks me up. She loves her chicken and broccoli. Ellie loves unicorns and rainbows, dinosaurs and mud. Ellie has two volumes; maxed out and off! This is true in everything about her! She is all in, or not at all. It makes for some really fun times, and some really frustrating times. But at the end of the day, Ellie holds so much love for everyone and everything and her smiles, hugs and kisses makes even the worst day, better.
Reagan is officially one month old this week! It is so funny how quickly time passes when the days are long. Reagan is starting to smile! It's not on purpose yet, but she's getting ready for it. She is definitely more attentive when you're talking to her and she's actually focusing on our faces now. It's really fun, especially since her babbling is really starting to take off this week.
Unfortunately, we all got super sick this week. Scott, Melia, Ellie and I all have found ourselves with this awful gross cold. The only accurate way I can describe it is a full body migraine. It just hurt all over with the addition of having a bad cough and losing our voices. Scott and I usually pass illnesses one to another, but we picked it up at the same time and we both had it the worst. The girls got it, they had one bad day of laying in bed and being miserable, but Scott and I were out for like two or three full days. It was so bad.
Among all this pain, I had an appointment at the Mammogram office to check on a lump in my breast. You may recall from Ellie that I developed a recurring clogged duct? It grew to the size of a golf-ball while Ellie was nursing and I had it drained a few times. A year AFTER Ellie was done nursing, it came back and I had it drained again. While I was pregnant with Reagan, this started to present itself again and was never consistent in size. Some days it was small and unnoticeable, other days it ached and was really large again. Since she's been born, it has more and more consistently gotten bigger and more painful. Scott was starting to really worry about it, so I went to have it checked. The ultrasound revealed that it is NOT a clogged duct, but a large breast cyst. It is a simple cyst and they are not worried about it. But because it keeps changing in size (probably due to my milk, but even now I can't find a real pattern to its behavior) we want to get it removed. It aches more days than not and it's usually around 4-5cm anymore, if not larger. I'll probably have it drained once or twice while Reagan nurses, and when she's done, I'll have it removed.
Week 6: May 9-15
This week started out great. Reagan has consistently been sleeping 5+ hours at night and she even gave us our first full 7 hours night this week! This is something we are not familiar with at all. Melia never slept; she was an awful sleeper. Ellie slept okay, but really never slept through the night until she was much older. So it's nice to actually get some sleep in this newborn phase of life. I also went to church for the first time after Reagan's birth this week. It was exciting and scary at the same time. It is always fun to show off your new baby, but I am still new to this ward (since our ward split the last week of February, I have only gone a few times) and I have been feeling overwhelmed about this new ward. Luckily! I still have Tiana, Lauren with me! I nee those ladies in my life.
Melia officially graduated Preschool this week! Oh my heavens! This girl has LOVED Stepping Stones Preschool. We have, too. It has been such a great experience, having Melia in preschool. She has done so well and she has a genuine desire to learn and explore the world. She is going to do great things, that Miss Melia. She is already reading and she writes really well too. Melia can do some basic addition and subtraction and she loves to draw. Her art is really coming along so well and she has a passion for drawing. I am really excited to see where she goes artistically and academically; I think she is going to have some major successes in her life in school. This week was also a hard week. May 13th, my Aunt Jodi unexpectedly passed away in her sleep. It was a shock to the whole family; especially since she had just visited so many of us all around the country. There are few times I worry about hearing my phone ring, but when my sister called me twice, followed by my dad calling me, I knew something had happened. I knew it was some sort of emergency, but never could I have imagined that it was this. Jodi brought a light and joy to the whole world, and she still will through her kids. I'm extremely grateful that I had my recent visits with her, that she got to see my girlies and meet Reagan and that Melia has this happy memory of Jodi setting up this great big Easter egg hunt for her, Ellie and Juniper. I am also grateful for my knowledge of the Plan of Happiness. I know that I will see her again and that she will be waiting at the gates for every member of our family with her bright smile and arms wide open. I love you, Jodi and I am so grateful for you!
Week 7: May 16-22
This week was filled with days at my mom's house, keeping her company and planning for family to come in for Jodi's funeral. Kara came down from Idaho to spend the week and so the girls got to play with Charlie, which they always love.
I think my favorite thing about this week was watching Charlie admire Reagan. He is so in love with Reagan and watching him is so precious. Charlie just goes up to her and gently watches her with all the love in the world filling his eyes. He would go back and forth to check on her and stop in the middle of whatever he was doing to go see if she was sleeping in her bed. Oh my heavens, it was the cutest thing I had ever seen.
Scott had a really big weekend this week! One of the members he baptized in Brazil got married in the San Diego temple this weekend! He and Elias Green, his companion at the time, drove to California for the wedding. When Mylena had messaged Scott asking if he could come, I knew right away that we would make it work. What an amazing opportunity and how special for all of them. I was nervous about him going and had planned to go spend the weekend at my mom's house, but I quickly realized as I was planning what we needed, that it was just too much work for two nights. So the girls and I hung out at our house while Scott had a marathon 48 hours of driving and visiting. Scott and Elias drove down, spent the night in a hotel, went to the wedding the next morning, spent another night in a hotel and drove home. It was mostly time in a car and sleeping! But he came home hoarse and elated. He and Elias talked and sang the whole trip. Partway through their drive to California, Scott sent me a text, "Can you imagine me talking for 3 hours straight?!" It was good for all of us, I think. Luckily, the girls and I had a good weekend and we were able to chat with Scott so it helped our sweet, tender-hearted girlies.
Week 8: May 23-29
This week was filled with family. Jodi's kids had all flown in this week for her funeral and a lot of our time was spent at family gatherings or planning for the funeral. We had Memorial Day lunch with everyone and it was fun to see my cousins in a happier atmosphere for a little bit. It is crazy to see how much Kimi's kiddos have grown. Her older, Noah, I remember when he was born and now he is 15! I also had my postpartum checkup with Dr. Thackeray this week. Scott came with me because he has still been worried about the cyst in my breast. It has gotten pretty big and it's been aching more consistently. Dr. Thackeray checked it out and said he's not worried about it, but if it continues to bother me, I can have it drained and probably get away with surgery while nursing if it really becomes a problem. This helped Scott, I think. We were told by the Doctor at the Mammogram office that I needed to wait to have it surgically removed or plan to stop nursing. I was not happy with this option because I want to nurse Reagan as long as she will let me! Dr. Thackeray thinks it is something that could be done during my nursing with Reagan. I still think I will stick to my plan of having it drained when needed while nursing then having the cyst removed when we're done.
Week 9: May 31-June 5
Jodi's funeral was this week. It was kind of all consuming. Reagan had her 2 month check up on the 31st and she was a champ through it all! I am super glad she had her shots because it meant she was tired and sleepy at the funeral. It was fortunate. Reagan handled the shots like a champ! She cried when she was pricked the second time, but was able to calm down after I held her for a minute. Reagan does not like binkies, which is new for us for sure, but she really does calm down pretty well. She also has started to suck her thumb this week! It is really cute, but I know it will be hard to take that away from her when she's older. For now, it's nice, because it means she self-soothes!
The funeral was hard. Jodi has so much positive energy and brought so much light and life into the world. My mom helped get her dressed for the viewing the day before and I asked her how it went. My mom just said, "Jodi isn't there anymore." I have been to a lot of funerals and I think this was the first time that the absence of someone's personality, light and soul, was apparent. We got there pretty early so Scott could practice his piano part for the music and I went into the viewing while there were few people even in the building. Jodi wasn't Jodi. It was so empty. It was so hard. Her bright, giant smile wasn't on her face and I can honestly say that I think that was the first time in my whole life that I didn't see her smiling; Jodi was always bringing life through her smile.
The funeral services were really beautiful though. My mom wrote a really beautiful eulogy on Jodi's life and their childhood together, Jon and the kids all got up to talk about Jodi and the constant positive influence she was not only to them, but everyone she ever met. Jodi would give everything she had to a perfect stranger if they needed it. Heaven needs her more, as hard as it is to say goodbye to her here, I know she will continue to bless our family with her love.
Melia and Ellie stared swim lessons this week! I remember just after Melia was born, I had several friends ask me if I would have her take swim lessons and I always answered, "No! I've spent my whole work life teaching and coaching swim, why would I sign my own kids up when I can teach them myself?" *Cue laughter of all the wiser parents than me* I tried, very hard, to teach my own children how to swim, but you just can't teach your own kids. They have done really well in just a few days! Ellie has absolutely NO FEAR of the water. That is a blessing and a curse; but that is exactly why we do swim lessons. Melia is starting to do well and relax in the water. I think because her ears are so sensitive, laying on her back is hard; but she has done that several times already in her lessons! I'm hopeful that they will learn quickly.
Reagan is officially 2 months old this week!! Melia and Ellie still love her so much and they always want to talk and love on this baby sister of theirs. Reagan is more often called Reagy, Reagy-Roo or Reagan Tate than she is just Reagan. She wakes up babbling and smiling, she loves bath time and she is perfectly content to lay and watch the world. Our family has been so blessed with her in our home and she brings a peace to the family that we will cherish! Reagan is tall and smart (big-headed) for her age. She loves to suck her thumb and loves to listen to music, especially Chopin (Scott is thrilled about this). She smiles so big and happily that her eyes light up when you get her attention. This sweet girl will go far with her love and peaceful personality. We are grateful to have such a tiny little bundle of love in our family! Though it is crazy and filled with lots of new adventures, our family of 5 is adjusting well and we Keep Moving Forward
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