Week 1:
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| Ellie Renee with Great Grandma Tarbox |
Labor day. It is always nice to have Scott home during the week. We just kind of hang out and play with the girls. As lazy as that sounds, it is so much fun. For Labor day, we went up to Grandma and Grandpa Tarbox's for a bbq with the family. It was fun. Melia got to play in the sandbox in the backyard, the tire swing (which she wasn't too sure about) and a big purple ball.
The rest of this week was really slow until the weekend, really. On Thursday night, we had our swim team parent meeting at the high school. It went a little long than I expected it to, but it was still good. We got a lot done and covered.
On Friday morning, September 9th, I woke up and took the girls up to see my mom. Ellie had been really difficult and I was tired so I asked if my mom could help. She took Ellie for a walk. Their walk was really short, I thought that seemed strange because she didn't mind walking the girls around. My mom called me back upstairs and told me that my friend Lindsey Swenson had passed away. It wasn't even 10:00 in the morning. The news was hard to process, it was so sudden. Hadn't I just seen her at church a couple months ago? Lindsey has struggled with depression for a long time and it had become too much for her. Lindsey was always the kindest, most devoted friend. She always made sure everyone felt loved and heard. There was always room for service in her life and she loved helping others. Lindsey and I grew up together playing soccer, we would sing together, could talk for hours. Our birthdays are only a week apart and I thought that was the coolest thing every because I respected Lindsey a lot. I always looked up to her for her strength and courage. I have known her most of our lives and now she is gone. It was a really hard weekend. Preparing to say goodbye to someone I love and have been close to for so long. Despite our visits growing far and few between the years after high school, I loved seeing her and our visits always lasted a couple hours at least. I know Lindsey is finally at peace and she is still watching out for everyone she loves, and that makes this easier. I still miss her.
Week 2:
This week was mostly filled with old friends and funeral plans. Tuesday night was Lindsey's viewing and it was so hard. I spoke to Lindsey one last time, told her I loved her and thanked her for always being such a great friend. I admired her beauty. Melia was with me while I was at Lindsey's side. Melia told me that Lindsey looked very pretty, she stroked Lindsey's shoulder and she looked at me, hugged me and told me she was sorry that I was so sad. Melia amazes me with her heart and her understanding. Scott told me to take my time and took the girls to play in another room. I stayed there for probably another hour or so, looked at pictures of Lindsey, watched the video put together of her life, and I cried. I came home and started making cupcakes for the funeral the next day. Other friends, Lindsey Webb, Maddie and Melissa came over to talk and help. That was nice, to have people come over. We chatted, they played with Ellie and it was pretty good.
Wednesday morning was Lindsey's funeral. It was beautiful. Erik, Lindsey's older brother, played a song on the piano and told us all he would let Lindsey sing with him one last time. It was something I don't think I will ever forget. It was so powerful. Kent, Lindsey's dad, talked about Lindsey's struggle with her depression and told us how she fought through it by helping others and finding ways to serve. The internment followed and we did a balloon release for her. While everyone trickled away from the burial site, I stood back and just looked at her casket. I spoke to her again and promised to visit.
Thursday was a pretty typical day. A lot of development with Ellie happens this month and it started today. She is getting more confident sitting up by herself and is starting to become unhappy on her tummy because she knows she can sit. Thursday night, as I was laying Melia down for bed, I asked if she wanted a buddy to sleep with. Melia has been having a harder time lately, telling me that there are monsters in her room and she is afraid. So I tell her to have happy dreams and that she has friends to help her sleep and have happy dreams. She told me she wanted Tigger to sleep with her. As I was grabbing him, I said, "He can bounce, bounce, bounce, his way over to you." Melia then told me that Tigger was, "Bouncing into my dreams!" and was very excited about it. My heart melted a little bit.On Saturday, the neighborhood had a picnic at the park up the street. Dallin and Matt came over to watch the game with us and so they joined us at the picnic. We weren't there for very long, but it was fun. We came home and got ready for game day. Made some yummy food and waited for our guests to come. I always love game days. It's nice to have people over haha.
Week 3:
This week was bubble week at the pool, so we couldn't have actual swim practice. We held classes at the high school and watched technique videos. On Tuesday I brought the girls with me to class. Melia was so good the whole time. It was actually pretty funny because she kept shushing the high school kids, saying they were too loud. But of course, they couldn't hear her because she was being shy and too quiet for them to hear. I loved the idea of it though! One of the girls on the team had
Speaking of Ellie struggling to sleep, this week was particularly hard for her. She wasn't nursing well at all, eating for short times and more frequently. She wasn't sleeping well either. While we had previously had her sleeping for 6 hours at night, she would wake up three times a night, every 2 hours or so. Uuuuugh. That was rough. It made for a very long, tired week with an unhappy Ellie and an unhappy Mama. But we survived and Ellie is getting back around to the idea of sleeping well.
Wednesday, my Aunt Linda called to let me know she was in our backyard with Henry and Ollie. My cousin Lauren and her husband were out of town for a couple weeks and Linda was here watching the boys. We joined them in the backyard and quickly decided to go to the park up the street. I pulled the three big kids in the wagon and my mom put Ellie in the stroller. Melia makes me laugh every time we go to this park because she always says, "Look! There's my park! It's my favorite park!" Everything is hers and it is hilariously adorable. Melia and Ollie went right to the playground while Henry sat with us mostly. My mom also encouraged a couple races around the playground which Henry quickly participated in. As I was starting to feel ready to leave, Ollie
conveniently noticed some sprinklers across the park and he and Melia TOOK OFF! I chased after them since they didn't stop when I shouted for them to. They just didn't even hesitate to run straight through the sprinklers and totally soaked themselves from head to toe. Melia and Ollie were just laughing uncontrollably, loving every second of it. The two of them are great friends and I love watching them play together. They are both at such a fun age and close enough together in age that it makes it a lot of fun for them. Melia loves Ollie and I am so glad that Lauren is close enough that we can see her and her boys often. It's nice to have family close. Thursday night the swim team had a fundraiser. It was nice for me to get away for a little bit at the end of the day. I was tehre for a little longer than I had hoped I would be, but it went well. We had a good turnout of kids come, which is always nice. It was POURING rain by the time I was headed home and it actually made the drive home pretty stressful, even though it was only 10 minutes from home. The rain was just coming down hard and fast. I think my winsheild wipers were one full speed and it was still barely enough to keep my window clear.
On Saturday, no one had RSVP'ed for the football game and Pops was going to be watching all by himself. So we decided, kind of last minute honesly, that we would go down to watch with him. It was a lot of fun. Melia was really good and played while we watched and Dallin and Matt showed up, too. Melia of course was more focused on playing than eating the lunch we got her, so it was a battle the entire time to get her to eat at least something. Dallin is a pro at getting Melia to eat, he's really funny and asks her to show him how all types of different animals eat. "Melia, but, but Melia, how does the.....tiger take a bite?!" and Melia will take a big bite of food and growl, pretty much for every animal haha. It is really cute.
Sunday was really, really cute. It was the primary program for our ward and Scott of course was up there the whole time on the piano. Melia was really excited about the primary program and kept asking me if she could go up and sing with them. I don't know how she's going to last an extra year in nursery because she is ready to be with the big kids. After the kids had finished singing I Love to See the Temple (one of Melia's favorite songs), Melia decided she would start singing The Itsy Bitsy Spider, actions and all. OH MY GOODNESS! She is just so precious. Melia was so proud of herself for singing her song and I loved it. Two sisters sang a duet together and Melia was just totally glued to them. She thought they were really pretty and that the song was pretty and she just soaked up every second of the program. I am so excited to see her when she gets into primary because she will love it. She loves Christ and music, and loves to learn. Melia was so sad when I had to tell her at the beginning of the meeting that she wasn't going to be up there with the rest of the kids. She is so ready.
Week 4:
This week we made it back to the pool for practices. Ooooooh the bubble. It is so stuffy and hot in there, especially the first month or so while the sun is still out and shining without any cold weather. So hot. Yucky. And it is difficult to breathe in there. But it is nice to be able to have a pool year around and that it can be an outdoor pool during the summer. But practice is practice and we will get used to it.
This week I also FINALLY got back to the chiropractor. That was nice. But yet again, I have a new ailment. My knee has been bothering me and popping like CRAZY. I asked him about it and he said
Friday night was the football game this week and it was just Elise this time around. My sister came downstairs too since Mom and Dad were at the game. That was a lot of fun. Elise and Kara got along well and WE WON! Woohoo. That was fun. Actually, it was really stressful haha. The game was back and forth the entire time and Toledo pulled ahead with like 1 minute to go. It was CHEAP because the receiver stepped FULLY out of bounds and then caught the ball and wasn't called on it....soooo that was dumb. But it didn't matter because we answered back and won with a field goal.
After the game, I went in to check on Melia, as I always do before going to bed, and gave her a kiss and told her that I loved her. As I turned around to check on Ellie, I heard Melia talking in her sleep. I wasn't sure what she said, so I tucked Ellie back in and then went back to Melia. I gave her another kiss, told her I loved her again, and Melia said, totally asleep, "I love you too." I told her to sleep well and she repeated it back, I told her to have sweet dreams, and she told me to have sweet dreams. I cried a little bit as my heart swelled with love for my sweet Melia Babe. Melia has a heart full of love.
Saturday and Sunday we had Dallin and Matt over for General Conference. It was a lot of fun. General Conference is always good. Between sessions today, Scott, the girls and I joined my parents on a little hike up in Draper. It was really nice. Pretty easy hike, but very pretty. Melia was so exhausted though. That girl can keep herself awake like no one I have every seen before. She got so grumpy when we got home though, that Scott had to make her take a nap. Usually she is pretty good without a nap for the day, but she took one today. I really enjoy listening to Conference because even if I don't realize I am struggling with something, someone will give a talk, and as I am listening, I will realize, "This is exactly what I needed" and it makes total sense to me. The Lord is good and He loves us!
Ellie is five months old. It is amazing to me how quickly she is growing. She is sitting up by herself now and can balance for several minutes at a time. She is already starting to crawl and is quite the champion of scooting herself around. Especially in circles. Ellie is determined and vocal; she loves to make herself known in the room. Melia and Ellie have a very special connection that is hard to put into words. They light up when they see each other and smile from ear to ear together. Melia loves to make Ellie laugh and I love watching it. Melia has a vocabulary that amazes Scott and I. She learns new words every day and loves to try new things. Melia is getting very good at drawing by herself and very freely draws spiders and stick figures. Melia has also started practicing writing her letters and knows how to vocally spell her name by herself. Melia is also convinced that Ellie's middle name is Belle, which it might as well be since that's what we always call her - Ellie Belle. Melia is adventurous and loves to climb and tumble. Ellie still hasn't cut any teeth yet, but I keep thinking she will just wake up with one any day now.
I am so grateful to be a wife and mother. Days can be hard and more often than not, I don't shower unless I have to or until Scott gets home. My life is messy and crazy, but I love it. Scott and I have been through a lot of emotions lately, but I know it has made us stronger. We will Keep Moving Forward together through our trials and our successes.
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